Anywhere But Here
by berrywarbler
Summary: au: Rachel gets stuck moving from Manhattan to Lima for her senior year of high school; quickly setting her sights on the glee coaches son. But when she finds out he's taken, and his older brother comes along, she realizes she may be in over her head.
1. New Girl

**a/n: **hey so remember when i said i was going to write nanowrimo? i gave up after about 6,500 words. it just isn't happening this year. fortunately this ends up well for you guys, since i finally got around to working on my au idea i've had for awhile. hope you enjoy~

* * *

><p>Rachel Berry could see the sun.<p>

It wasn't blocked by tall buildings, or smog, there were no cabs or cars rushing past her, tourists yammering on about how everything seemed to bright and dirty at the same time.

There were trees, and houses, and she already hated it. They hadn't even arrived at their new house-not even an apartment, a _house_, with a driveway and everything-and she already wanted to go back. She had wanted to go back about three weeks ago when her dads first announced the impending move, and she tried-unsuccessfully-to find a way around it. But they were stubborn, even more so than she was, and so she lost out.

And now she was moving to _Lima, Ohio_. Even the name was boring.

"I hate it here," she announced, and her dads just gave her a bemused smile as one played with the GPS while the other drove.

"You'll have to get used to it dear," one told her.

"You need something new," the other added.

"I'm going back as soon as I can," she informed them, and they just chuckled.

"We'd expect nothing less of you," they said, practically in unison as she sighed, going back to her magazine only to realize she had finished it nearly two hours ago. The drive from Manhattan was long, and tedious, and nearly as boring as she was sure Lima was going to be.

She already wanted to go back.

* * *

><p>"This is Mr. Schuester," the principal introduced to Rachel as a curly haired man walked into the office, reaching out a hand to shake with Rachel's dad. "He's one of our Spanish teachers, as well as the advisor for our glee club."<p>

"It's a pleasure to meet you Rachel," Mr. Schuester greeted, shaking her hand next. "I hear you're an incredibly talented singer."

"Yes," she replied, and added a "Thank you," quickly after a glance from her father. She had the potential to be snotty and a bitch, but she was taught impeccable manners and respect. _You can't be respected if you don't respect others_, her dads always said when she snapped back at them.

"Well, we're all set in here if you want to go to the rehearsal now," Principal Figgens allowed, and Rachel stood, thanking the principal and placing a kiss on her father's cheek before disappearing down the hall, listening as the teacher went over everything she needed to know.

"We have our sectionals coming up in a couple weeks-we've given a solo to Santana and then Quinn and Finn are performing a duet, with Puck and Blaine leading the group in an song to end our performance, but I'm sure you'll fit in right away," he rambled, Rachel nodding politely as she listened. He led her into a small choir room-at least, small to Rachel, who was used to her private arts school she had been attending since kindergarten, with an emphasis on the performing arts and more specifically musical theater.

She looked around as Mr. Schuester tried to grab their attention, to introduce Rachel. There was a tall boy playing drums in the corner with a guy sporting a mohawk playing guitar quietly along with him, three cheerleaders sitting in a group gossiping, a guy and a girl talking animatedly, the boy signaling to his scarf about something. She let her eyes scan the room, finally resting on where a curly haired guy was sitting next to the scarf boy, looking right at her with what looked like interest. She would have passed it off as being the new girl, but she knew it was something more than that.

"Guys!" Mr. Schuester yelled, everyone settling down and turning to face him now, before their eyes settled on Rachel. "I'd like to introduce you to our newest member, Rachel Berry. She's new to the school, all the way from New York, so please give her a warm McKinley welcome," he said, and a few of the guys grinned at her, the girls mostly eyeing her warily.

"Can she even sing?" the boy with the scarf asked, the boy next to him shooting him a glare.

"Of course I can,' she answered cockily before Mr. Schuester even got a chance to defend her. She turned to the guy at the piano-there seemed to be a whole assortment of musicians just waiting for their cue to sing, and quietly asked if he knew _Don't Rain On My Parade_. When he nodded, she grinned and turned back around, grabbing a microphone-it was plain, and she longed for the bedazzled one she had decorated one Saturday morning two years ago, but it was packed away. Regardless, when the moment arrived, she started singing, the room stunned into silence as she belted out a song she knew few could. Barbra was her idol, her inspiration, and _Parade _was always a song she liked having in her back pocket whenever she needed it.

When she was done, the guy who challenged her was wiping away a tear as she fought off a smirk, the room clapping politely as she found a spot right in the center of the group.

"Thank you for that Rachel," Mr. Schuester said after a moment. "That was-that was phenomenal." She could tell, by the glint in his eye, that the thought of winning a competition seemed a lot more likely now.

She had that effect on people.

* * *

><p>"Hello," Rachel said, appearing at the locker of the boy she had noticed the day before, biting back a grin at his startled expression. "I'm Rachel," she introduced, holding out her hand.<p>

He chuckled, taking it and shaking it. "I remember," he said, "I'm Blaine."

"Blaine," she repeated, swirling the name around in her mouth for a second before she noticed the look she had seen the day before-the one that meant he was interested in her, intrigued by her, one she wanted to capitalize on quickly. "Well, it's lovely to meet you Blaine. Walk me to class?" she asked, a coy smile on her face as a taller boy slid up, the scarf one from yesterday, now wearing a different Alexander McQueen scarf.

"Actually," he said, interrupting them, "he has to walk me to class," he replied with a smug, kissing Blaine quickly. Rachel glanced between the two, trying to figure out what was going on. The obvious answer was right there, that they were dating-she had already assumed the taller one was gay, but she didn't want to jump to conclusions. But Blaine-he threw her for a curve. She had very good gaydar, she thought, for practically living and breathing nothing but a musical theater atmosphere since she was a fetus, and having two gay dads.

"Rachel, this is my-Kurt," Blaine stumbled, blushing a bit, and Rachel smiled graciously at _Kurt_.

"Boyfriend," Kurt said, his glare in Blaine's direction going unnoticed as Blaine went back to his locker, trying to grab more books. "I'm his boyfriend," he repeated, turning to Rachel.

"Well, then you can both walk me to class," she decided, and while Kurt raised an eyebrow, he took the schedule from on top of her binder and looked over it.

"AP French first period? I'm in that class too, so I guess we will walk you to class," he mused, looking over the rest of her schedule. She grinned, linking arms with Kurt-she could tell he was a lot like her, already, and could see the future for them-an up and down relationship with an argument over who was more talented on a daily basis, but she knew she'd always win. Blaine trudged along behind them, quietly, and Rachel decided to indulge in more of a conversation with Kurt for the time being.

"So, tell me about this glee club," she started, and he laughed, a pleasant noise, not even bothering to wave as Blaine disappeared a different hallway before starting in on what sounded like twelve years worth of gossip.

* * *

><p>By the time glee rolled around that afternoon, she knew most of the groups names. She knew Puck and Quinn were off and on dating, but they were currently off since Finn was now dating Quinn again. Brittany and Santana-the other two cheerleaders-were dating, but that was supposed to be a secret. Mercedes was Kurt's best friend, and Sam did impressions of people a lot. Quinn had apparently been knocked up a couple years previous, a big scandal as she was caption of the Cheerio's and president of the celibacy club, and more importantly dating Finn even though it was Puck's child.<p>

They sat through AP French going over everything and anything she might have needed to know, their teacher completely ignoring them. "And we haven't won since Mr. Schuesters older son, Jesse, left a couple years ago-I was a sophomore then, but god he was talented," he said wistfully, staring off into the distance.

"Was he cute?" she teased, and Kurt rolled his eyes.

"I would never say he was-Blaine's lived in the shadows of Jesse's spotlight for so long that it'd break his heart," Kurt admitted, and Rachel raised an eyebrow but nodded. So Blaine was Mr. Schuesters son. That shouldn't have been too surprising, she supposed, though beyond the hair and the vests they seemed keen on wearing, she couldn't really see the resemblance.

"How long have you and Blaine been dating?" she asked nonchalantly. She still wasn't 100% convinced Blaine was totally gay, but she'd play along, for now at least.

"Over a year now," Kurt sighed wistfully. "He was originally going to a private school, but I guess with Jesse going to college they couldn't afford it anymore, so he transferred here, and it was love at first sight. We're moving to New York for college next year," Kurt gushed.

Rachel smiled politely, nodding along. "New York is amazing," she admitted, and this seemed to capture Kurt's attention away from himself as he prodded her for details, wanting to know exactly what it was like living there, and Rachel was never one to shy away from talking about herself, so she answered every single one.

By the end of the period, Kurt was already her new best friend, and while Mercedes didn't appreciate Rachel's new place next to Kurt-Blaine on his other side, still quiet, though Kurt assured Rachel that he just was over stressed with college applications due so soon, Rachel was content enough to sit through Quinn and Finn singing an old Fleetwood Mac song, Kurt humming along under his breath.

When she glanced past him, over at Blaine, he was looking at her again-in the same, intrigued but quiet fashion.

Yes, she was going to have to find a way to get closer to him, she was already sure of that.


	2. Something's Coming

Rachel still hated McKinley. She missed the city, and sitting in Sheep Meadow after school, and wandering down Fifth Ave and having lunch at the Plaza fountain. Ohio was boring, with its faux-Italian restaurant and 'quaint' coffee place. She missed the busy and the stressed. Even though she was taking all AP's and had already claimed the role of leader of the New Directions, she was bored. Everything was too easy, and she liked a challenge.

She figured that was probably part of the reason she had her sights set on Blaine. It had only been a week since her first day, and while her and Kurt were blossoming quickly into best friendship, Blaine seemed to be almost avoiding her. She was busy trying to settle in-though it was a big difference between settling in in NYC and settling in in Ohio-and figured it wouldn't be best to let Kurt know that she had already decided to go after his boyfriend, especially seeing as he was the only one who really deemed to talk to her.

She hadn't had a particularly large group of friends in New York, but she had enough that coming to a new school and being instantly hated for no apparent reason was stressing her out. Quinn had already accosted her in the hallway, throwing around words like 'man-hands' and 'stay away from my boyfriend'. Not that Rachel could even remember which one she was actually dating, but the words "It's not your boyfriend I'm interested in," fell out of her mouth before she thought through the repercussions.

Fortunately, Kurt hadn't been around for that.

Unfortunately, Blaine had.

Still, it wasn't until she found out the drama department was doing _West Side Story _that she had a real conversation with him.

"Who'd you get?" she asked, sliding up next to where he was frowning at the cast sheet.

"Tony," he answered simply, and she gaped at him before even looking where she knew her name would be next to Maria-she had stared as Maria before in a production back in freshman year, it would be an outrage if she didn't now.

"Why do you look upset? Tony is the male lead!" She kept the fact that this meant the two would be becoming _very _close in the coming months to herself, but saw it as a private victory as she glanced at the paper to confirm that, yes, she had landed the lead.

"Kurt's going to be upset," Blaine said, finally turning to face her-and oh, wow, she had not been prepared for how _amazing _his eyes were. It took her a minute to process his words, but when she finally did, she was even more confused than before.

"Isn't he your boyfriend? Shouldn't he be proud and supportive?"

Blaine gave her a strained smile. "You clearly don't know Kurt well enough yet," he said quietly, sighing once more as he glanced at the casting sheet. "I guess I'll see you at rehearsal later," he said, and she gave him a small wave, thinking that maybe getting Blaine away from Kurt would be even easier than previously anticipated.

* * *

><p>"You're really good," she said three days later as they sat on the edge of the stage after rehearsal. Artie had wanted to run through the 'One Heart, One Hand' scene, and Kurt had made some comment about how great of actors they were.<p>

"If I wasn't so sure about my boyfriend, I'd be worried you were stealing him away Rachel Berry," Kurt had trilled before walking off to help Finn-who turned out to be his stepbrother-figure out a plan to win Quinn back. Blaine had shot her an uncomfortable look while she smiled serenely.

"Thanks," he said, bringing her back to the present. "You're-I mean, you're incredibly talented," he said, knocking shoulders with her. She blushed, but just nodded her appreciation. "I don't understand why you'd ever leave New York to come to Ohio with talent like that."

She gave a small frown, so far she had avoided mentioning _why _she was dragged to suburbia. People had asked, sure, but she just ignored them and went on about her day. But there was something about Blaine that made her tempted to open up, that maybe her attraction towards him was more than skin deep.

"I was kicked out of my school," she said quietly, and Blaine's eyes flashed shock as he turned to look at her, practically speechless.

"You were-but-how?" he asked, completely forgetting that he seemed to always distance himself from her as he scooted closer, their legs touching as he waited for her response.

"I got caught screwing around with one of my teachers," she replied snidely, the heat rushing to her face as she did so. She was rarely so bitchy, but this was a sensitive subject, and one she avoided at all costs. He raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything, and she let out a low sigh. "It's a long story," she said, hoping it would make him realize that in order to hear it, he'd have to spend more time with her, something she was sure Kurt wouldn't approve of. She may not have been around for too long yet, but she could already tell that Kurt didn't want Blaine spending too much time with anyone except him.

"I have time," he said instead, surprising what looked like the both of them. She nodded, taking a deep breath, and launching into the story she was convinced she'd keep quiet as long as she could.

* * *

><p>It had all started during the last quarter of classes the previous year-in a typical act of teenage rebellion, Rachel found herself the one boy she knew her dads would completely disapprove of. An 'artist'-and she used that term loosely, because she never actually saw any evidence that he did anything artistic-who was into some harder drugs than even she had seen passed around at parties she occasionally attended. She had always been the 'good girl'-quiet, nice, shy. Talented and confident to the point of cocky, but still flew relatively under the radar.<p>

But Josh-he got under her skin, opened up this whole new world for her. Changed everything. She had never delved into the world of smoking and drugs-even in her rebellion, her future and her voice were the most important things to her. But she fell in to a darker crowd than she was used to, started doing things that weren't like her at all.

And when, one day, a teacher who had always seen such a great potential in Rachel, seemed concerned, asked if everything was okay, warned her to stay away from the older boy who was leading her into trouble, she simply said "Fuck you," and walked out of class.

They had immediately called in a counsel, the principal, the teacher, her dads. _We're concerned Rachel_, they had said. _What about your future Rachel? _But Rachel was young, she wanted to _live_. How was she ever going to play parts with a dark past if she didn't have a few snags in her own road? And when the principal informed her that she needed to apologize or face a suspension, at least until the end of the year, she simply told her she wasn't going to apologize for using her freedom of speech.

* * *

><p>"And you got kicked out for that?" Blaine asked, slightly amused. She rolled her eyes, realizing how much more dramatic it sounded without the real story.<p>

"It's an incredibly strict school Blaine, very no-tolerance and all that," she sighed. "But by the time the headmaster had come and told my dads that they didn't want me coming back for my senior year, suggesting it was best I look into alternative education, they had already decided to move back here."

"Back?" Blaine asked, startling her. She hadn't even noticed the word slip, but she nodded, wondering how she had gotten in this deep already. Although, when she looked up, his kind gaze was directed on her, and she felt herself getting momentarily lost in the hazel of his eyes, and she realized that, _oh, yeah, that's why_.

"They lived here before I was born," she explained. "My-the woman who surrogated for them lived here, and they wanted to be around her for the pregnancy."

"Have you ever met her?" he asked, and she glared at him.

"I think this conversation has delved far enough into my life, thank you," she said shortly, standing up, her hair practically bristly on edge as she headed for the side of the stage where her bag was ditched, Blaine running up behind.

"Sorry, I just-you were so open, I probably crossed a line and I apologize," he said, catching up to her. She turned to face him, her face still stern as he looked at her apologetically. "I'm sorry Rachel. You're just so-brash? I suppose? I didn't think there's anything that could upset you."

"That's because you know nothing about me," she snapped, and he looked guiltily down at his feet, not meeting her gaze. She felt bad, after a few moments, and realized she may have overreacted. "I'm sorry," she said quietly, and he looked up at her in surprise. "I'm just not used to opening up to others, not anymore," she shrugged, trying to sound carefree as she focused on anything that wasn't Blaine.

"You can open up to me," he offered, his voice so quiet she wasn't even sure she had heard him.

"You barely even talk to me, outside of rehearsal," she said, waving to the stage around them. He let out a low chuckle, the sound getting her entire focus.

"Well, then I guess we're just going to have to change that," he said, giving her a warm smile. "After all, I'm assuming that I'm now the only one to know your secret?" She nodded, and his smile turned into a grin, his hand clapping her on the shoulder. "Then I guess you're stuck with me now."

She let out a laugh, surprising herself. "I suppose I am," she said, picking up her bag. "But if that's the case, I'm going to have to give you some notes on how to be a better Tony."

"I'd expect no less Rachel," he chuckled, grabbing his own bag. "I'd expect no less."

* * *

><p>Rachel and Blaine became nearly inseparable. Her feelings for him didn't dissipate-if anything, they grew, but she knew she had to keep them hidden under wraps, only letting out small bits when they were on stage as Tony and Maria. Kurt seemed a little annoyed, though Rachel wasn't really sure why.<p>

"He, uh, he's just a little jealous," Blaine mumbled one day when Rachel complained about the snark directed her way from Kurt.

"Jealous?" she asked, raising an eyebrow, and Blaine nodded.

"Yeah," he said, his voice a little more clear. "Apparently, you've caught the eye of Finn, and while Kurt assures me his feelings for Finn are purely platonic now, he's still a little…"

"Jealous," Rachel chuckled with a roll of her eyes. "We have to make out in front of an entire auditorium for two weekends in a row, not to mention countless rehearsals, but he's worried I'm going to steal away his step brother?" Blaine shrugged, looking slightly uncomfortable as Rachel looked at him. They hadn't actually gotten to the kissing yet, though she couldn't deny that she was very excited about it. She was convinced that proving to him that they had physical chemistry would be the key to proving she was a far superior match for him than Kurt. She had taken to watching them, how Kurt was always bossing him around, practically controlling his every move. How Kurt was free to admit his jealousy of his brother, who Rachel found out from some kid who had taken to following her around asking for a pair of her underwear, used to be the object of Kurt's affection. How Kurt seemed to view Blaine as an accessory more than a boyfriend, and how it upset Blaine.

She just couldn't see why, if he was so upset about it, he never said anything. Not that it wouldn't work in her favor, in the end, but when she said maybe he should grow a back bone and confront his boyfriend about these obvious flaws, all Blaine could retort with was "Aren't you supposed to be his new best friend or something?"

She blinked at him, and unabashedly went with "I'd rather be your friend than his." He gave her the lingering stare she was becoming used to, the one she wasn't sure how to read. The one that spoke of interest and confusion and intrigue all in one, a look she noticed he hadn't given Kurt, at least not in the three weeks she had now been there.

"I guess it's a good thing you don't have to choose then," he said dryly, and she bit back the _yet _from falling off her tongue.


	3. About To Break

Rachel could honestly say she was less than surprised at Kurt's sudden bitterness thrown in her direction. Now that rehearsals were fully under way, Blaine and her had been spending most of their time together. Though, much to Rachel's dismay, they still hadn't done any of the kissing required of the two main leads-whether this was intentional or not, she wasn't sure.

"Maybe we should find you a boyfriend," Kurt said one day, practically perched on top of Blaine as they sat around waiting for Artie to tell them what they'd be working on for the day. She had become used to his passiveness, though Blaine looked a little apprehensive about it.

"I'd rather focus on getting back to New York," Rachel replied as she reviewed her script for the ten thousandth time. It wasn't that she needed too-she didn't even need a script _period_-but it calmed her down from the stress of everything else.

"But maybe if you had a boyfriend-"

"She said she doesn't want one Kurt," Blaine snapped, and Rachel fought back the smile that threatened to take over her face.

"Well then," Kurt said simply, pursing his lips as the three silenced themselves. "Are we going to go out to Breadstix tonight?" he asked quietly, turning to speak to Blaine, though Rachel watched them cautiously.

"Well, um," Blaine stumbled, and Rachel wanted nothing more than to inform Kurt that no, Blaine would not be joining him for dinner because he would be far too busy rehearsing with Rachel to spend time with his actual boyfriend. She kept quiet, however, waiting for Blaine to answer Kurt. "I kind of already promised Rachel we'd rehearse tonight?" he finally said, his voice raising at the end as he looked guiltily at Kurt.

"But you practice all afternoon," Kurt stated, Rachel still sitting next to the pair, flipping to another page of her script. "You practice together all afternoon, _every _afternoon," he continued, now turning his glare towards Rachel. "How much rehearsal do you really need?"

"We want to make sure this performance is perfect Kurt," she said calmly.

"You've already played Maria before. I'm sure your performance will be flawless," Kurt argued back, his eyes narrowing.

"Every Maria is different," Rachel retorted, "Especially when it's with a new Tony." Kurt looked ready to retort, instead snapping his mouth closed and storming off without another word, Rachel going back to her script and singing _Tonight _under her breathe, Blaine letting out a deep breath behind her.

* * *

><p>"I cannot stay!" Rachel said, fully engrossed in the role of Maria as they paced around Blaine's living room, his parents out at a faculty dinner of some sort. "Go, quickly!"<p>

"I'm not afraid," Blaine replied, just as engrossed in Tony as she was in Maria. If she let herself think about it, he was her perfect Tony-and she had told him as such on several occasions, often causing him to blush and stutter out a quiet 'thank you'.

"They are strict with me, please," Rachel pleaded, and this-this was the point where they were supposed to kiss. Blaine hadn't questioned why she wanted to practice this scene, hadn't even said a word about it, and while she saw a flicker of worry behind the façade of Tony, he leaned forward and placed a small kiss on her mouth regardless.

It was even better than she had predicted, even if it was short, his lips against hers momentarily took her breath away, but then he was speaking again, "Good night," he said quietly, and she tried to remember her next line.

"Buenos noches," she finally replied, waiting for the line that was sure to turn her crush into an obsession, waiting to hear him say _I love you_, because she knew she wasn't going to take it as Tony saying it to Maria, but as Blaine saying it to her.

"I love you," a voice called out from behind her, and she whirled around in surprise to find a taller boy, a year or two older than them, Blaine's disgusted sigh not going unnoticed by Rachel.

"What are you doing here?" Blaine asked, completely ruining the scene just as Rachel was about to continue on.

"It's my house too," the boy smirked, and Rachel connected the pieces quickly-this was the elusive Jesse, the older brother who was somehow supposed to be _more _talented than Blaine. He walked over, grinning at Rachel, offering a hand. "Jesse. Jesse St. James," he said, and she timidly took his hand in hers, shaking it quickly, somehow intimidated by him in a way no one had ever done before. It was almost like she was _starstruck_, which was ridiculous.

"Jesus Christ," Blaine groaned from the other side of her, and Rachel only felt slightly bad as she let out a giggle. "When are you going to stop using fake names again?"

Rachel looked a little confused as she glanced between the two, and Jesse shrugged, his eyes focused on Rachel. "Okay, so it's Schuester, but St. James is a better stage name, is it not?" he asked, slinging an arm around Rachel's shoulder, causing her to flush a bright pink at the contact.

"It does sound better," she admitted, knowing deep down that he didn't really care about her opinion, but he grinned at her as he started leading her away, leaving Blaine behind them, Rachel turning to give him an apologetic glance before introducing herself and letting Jesse get to know her better.

* * *

><p>Rachel's plan with Jesse was simple: use him as a device to get Blaine jealous enough to realize he wanted Rachel for his own. She figured the rivalry between the two alone would be good enough to set him off, and sure enough, the next day at school, Blaine had taken to ignoring her. When she tried to ask him about it, he muttered something about ditching him before storming off, Kurt appearing at her side a moment later.<p>

"I hear Jesse is back in town," Kurt said quietly, and Rachel just sighed. "He always gets a little more tense with his brother around," he frowned, still watching where Blaine was now slamming his locker closed down the hallway. "I'm sure once Jesse leaves for college again he'll calm down." But Rachel could hear the undercurrent of worry in his voice, that maybe Blaine _wouldn't _calm down, and a part of her felt slightly bad for abandoning Blaine for Jesse when they were supposed to be rehearsing.

But then she remembered that this was what she needed, for Blaine to realize they were supposed to be together. If she waited for him to come to it by natural means, it might have taken forever.

* * *

><p>"Now, I know we've been skating around the kissing," Artie stated later that day at practice, and Rachel raised an eyebrow at his statement as Blaine shuffled awkwardly next to her, "but we're going to have to make sure that it seems legitimate too, so this time-just go for it Blaine," he said, and Blaine frowned but nodded, his eyes flickering to where Kurt was hiding in the corner of the stage. She didn't roll her eyes, much as she wanted to, instead snapping her fingers in front of his face to focus him.<p>

They went through the lines, so well-rehearsed by now that they didn't need the scripts, and when it came time for the kiss, Blaine didn't even hesitate.

Rachel had suspected he was a good kisser, but the real thing was so much better, and while it was a little more Rachel-and-Blaine oriented than Tony-and-Maria oriented, with an undercurrent of jealousy and claiming than of new born love and romance, she still was practically speechless when they broke apart.

Artie let out a low whistle from his spot in the chairs, saying something about how he definitely cast the right Tony and Maria, and Blaine looked just as confused as she was sure he felt. She was going to say something to him, though she wasn't sure what yet, before Kurt stomped out of the room, slamming the door behind him loudly.

"I'm sorry," Blaine said quietly, just to Rachel, and she couldn't do anything more than let out a small sigh of exasperation as he ran after Kurt, calling his name.

Then again, if he hadn't, she might not have liked him as much.

* * *

><p>"So according to a <em>very <em>loud fight that took place in my living room this afternoon, I think it's sufficient to say that you and Blaine make a pretty good Tony and Maria?" Jesse asked later that night as they dined out at Breadstix. Rachel nodded, frowning slightly.

"Yeah, Kurt apparently wasn't pleased with the…intensity, I suppose, of our kiss," she shrugged, breaking the breadstick in her hand into smaller and smaller pieces.

"I believe his exact words were 'you kissed that whore like you've never kissed me'," Jesse smirked, and Rachel couldn't even bring herself to be hurt at Kurt's accusation.

"Well that says a lot about their relationship," she replied dryly instead, and Jesse let out a small laugh.

"I have no idea how my brother puts up with Kurt," Jesse said with a shake of his head. "The kid is a giant pain in the ass."

"I've heard the same about you," Rachel countered, and Jesse didn't even try and deny it.

"I let my talent be the number one thing about me," he answered, and she realized that was what she did more often than not. "I didn't feel the need to be nice to those around me who were clearly subpar compared to me, and I was the only reason anyone ever won a competition. And Hummel has always been incredibly insecure, if there's even the slight bit of competition he goes insane," Jesse explained with a shrug.

"I'm hardly competition," Rachel lied with a dramatic eye roll.

"I think we both know that you are," Jesse said quietly, and when Rachel was about to question him further, their waiter arrived and broke the moment.

* * *

><p>"Stay away from him," Kurt snarled as he walked by Rachel the next morning, and she let out a short laugh, not bothering to cover it up.<p>

"Excuse me?" she questioned, and he stopped to face her, his blue eyes fierce as they glared at her.

"Stay. Away. From. Blaine," he repeated.

"I think that'd be a little hard to do, since we're stars in the school musical. Unless you made him drop out, which wouldn't surprise me," she said off-handedly, ignoring his raise of an eyebrow. "Newsflash Kurt, if I wanted your boyfriend, I'd have him by now."

"Stay away from him," Kurt said one last time, starting to walk away.

"You know what?" Rachel called out, not bothering to lower her voice even though the hallway was becoming crowded. "I don't think I will. I think you could use a little competition. See if you actually deserve what you have, because I don't think you do." He turned to stare at her, eyes wide in shock, and she just shrugged before turning and heading in the opposite direction.


	4. Closer

Rachel had rapidly come to the conclusion that being obvious in her affection to Blaine would only backfire on her, and so-despite that it pleased Kurt-she backed off. She still got to kiss him on stage, and they still were around each other constantly-between school and the musical and her new relationship status with Jesse-but she didn't let on that she would rather be with Blaine.

Jesse was just a distraction, nothing more and nothing less. He complimented her and told her stories about college, never answering why he was back for such a prolonged period of time when she questioned him on it. They spent hours locked away in his bedroom, Rachel resisting the urge to be make it even more obvious to Blaine in the next room as to what was going on.

Blaine, for his part, seemed to be trying to ignore the jealousy he was clearly feeling. He was subtle about it, which only made Rachel spur on more. A snippy comment here or there, his kiss a little to fierce when they were on stage, a little too possessive. But she knew it was there, caught his glare when she kissed Jesse when he'd surprise her after rehearsal, saw how there were marks littering Kurt's body that she was sure Kurt didn't allow.

They continued on in this charade, Rachel dating Jesse and Blaine pretending it didn't faze him in the least. She knew it was only a matter of time before he cracked, before he gave in to what he was clearly feeling for her.

She was Rachel Berry, after all, and she always got what she wanted in the end.

* * *

><p>"You like her," Jesse said with an amused tone, and Rachel held her breathe as she silently waited for Blaine's reply. She wasn't supposed to overhear this conversation, she knew that. But she needed to change before going back on stage and clearly Jesse felt the need to have this conversation in her dressing room during intermission.<p>

"What?" came Blaine's wary reply, and she knew without seeing him that he was giving his brother a skeptical stare.

"Rachel. You have a crush on her," Jesse said calmly.

"I'm gay," Blaine replied just as evenly, though his tone was a little more harsh.

"I mean, it's to be expected. Now that she's falling head over heels for me-" Rachel rolled her eyes, hardly considering her feelings for Jesse as 'head over heels'.

"She's not as into you as you think she is," Blaine retorted, his tone even harsher now, and Rachel had to give him credit for seeing through her as much as she saw through him.

"Nonsense," Jesse waved away, and Rachel peeked through the door, sensing maybe she should walk in before things escalated, opening it as she would normally, as if she hadn't just been eavesdropping.

"Oh!" She exclaimed when she walked in, pretending to have not known of their appearance in the small room. "What are you two doing in here?"

"Nothing," Blaine snapped, fixing his costume slightly. "I'll see you on stage," he said briskly, walking past her without another word towards Jesse. She watched him go, apprehensive, but then Jesse's hands were on her waist, pulling her close.

"You're doing amazing out there," he murmured, and she gave him a small smile. It wasn't the same with Jesse as it was with Blaine. Sure, she liked him enough, and there was enough chemistry that she'd continue to date him, at least until Blaine came around, but none of the sparks or electricity ran through her when the two kissed, not like she felt when Blaine kissed her.

She just had to find a way to get him to kiss her _off _stage.

* * *

><p>"Most importantly, I'd like to thank Rachel and Blaine for being the perfect Tony and Maria," Artie said later that night, Jesse's hand squeezing Rachel's waist at the mention of her name. "This show would have definitely sunk had it not been for the incredibly chemistry you two brought to life. Thank you." Everyone around them clapped, and Rachel just smiled warmly at them all, Blaine straining a smile with Kurt on his side.<p>

She watched as his eyes found hers, even as Kurt leaned over to place a kiss on his cheek, and knew that she was getting closer and closer to her ultimate goal.

* * *

><p>With the parent Schuesters out of town, Jesse had promptly asked Rachel to spend the night. She had been hesitant-she had been pretty adamant that she <em>would not <em>sleep with Jesse, because that was crossing a line in her brain. Anything else, she could explain away. But having sex with him would officially ruin anything that could happen between Blaine and her, and she wasn't going to risk that.

Still, the idea of even sleeping in the same house as Blaine was too tempting, and she agreed, telling her fathers she'd be spending the night at Kurt's-they weren't up to date on their current fight for Blaine's affections, and off to Jesse's she went.

Blaine was out when she got there, "Off with Kurt," Jesse replied warily when she asked about it, and she gave him an apologetic grin when she realized why he seemed frustrated.

"Sorry, I just wanted to make sure we were really _alone_," she lied, standing on her toes to kiss him. He seemed to accept her explanation, leading her up the stairs without another word.

They spent most of their evening in his room, watching movies when she finally managed to stop his attempts to get up her skirt, Rachel all too aware of the front door slamming when Blaine came home. She thought she heard Jesse sigh when it happened, though if it was at the intrusion of Blaine's presence in the house or the way her body immediately tensed, she wasn't sure.

She lay awake as he eventually fell asleep beside her, his hand on her waist possessively, making her feel tired and exhausted of their own charade they were going through. Still, she couldn't sleep, and after an hour or so she finally headed to the kitchen to get herself a glass of water.

"Rachel?" Blaine's voice called out, startling her from her thoughts as she nearly dropped her glass, trying to regain her breathing.

"Blaine!" she hissed, and he flicked on one of the duller lights in the room.

"What are you doing?" he asked, and now that she was breathing normally again she could take in his plain tee-shirt and plaid pajama pants, wanting nothing more than to throw him against the fridge and claim him as her own.

"I was thirsty," she said instead, holding up her glass of water.

"I see," he replied, moving towards the cabinet to get himself a glass for some water. "How was your night with _Jesse_?" he asked, his tone slightly mocking as she rolled her eyes, sliding up to sit on the counter.

"How was your night with _Kurt_?" she retorted back, and he just shrugged, looking out the window over the sink, looking a little lost as he did so. She frowned, quiet as she asked if everything was all right.

"I'm fine," he replied automatically, turning to face her. She raised an eyebrow, and he just raised one back, neither backing down.

"I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours," she sang quietly, and he let out a low chuckle, nodding as he took her empty glass from her hand and placing them both on the sink, leaning against it as he took a deep breath.

"Okay, well," he started, his gaze focused solely on the ceiling above them. "We've been fighting a lot-a lot more than we ever have before. Mostly about the same thing, over and over, and despite that I keep having to reassure him that nothing's happening, or that I would never hurt him-he doesn't believe me. Think's it's an inevitability or something." She tried to bite back the grin that she felt, despite his veiled words, she knew what he was speaking of. "And now we're getting to the point where we're trying to figure out if it's even worth it anymore."

"I'm sorry," she spoke quietly, reaching out a hand to touch his cheek, cupping it in her hand in a caring manner. He closed his eyes against the contact, seemingly content for a moment, before he opened them and looked at her once more.

"What about you? What's _yours_?"

She took a deep breath, making a snap decision to lay it on the table in much clearer words than he had for her. "I'm dating a boy just to make his brother jealous, and I think both of them are getting frustrated with it," she said with a small shrug, taking in the slight widening of Blaine's eyes at her admittance.

"Do you have any real feelings for him at all?" Blaine asked quietly, and she just shook her head. Jesse was too conceited, too much like her for her to really trust him completely. Blaine was a gentleman, nice and kind and humorous and she could trust him because he'd never intentionally hurt anyone. "Then why don't you break up with him?"

"And then how am I going to get you to realize you like me as much as I like you?" she whispered, and he just shook his head, rubbing his temples as he tried to think through everything she was saying.

"You make life incredibly complicated Rachel Berry," he tried to joke, and she gave him a wan smile but didn't respond. "Well, you can safely break up with him now, because you've made me realize it. Even if I don't want to, and don't know what to do about it, I know that I do have feelings for you."

"That's not enough for me," she replied simply. "You're still with Kurt, and until that dissolves or stays strong, I'm going to continue to stay with Jesse."

"I could tell him all this," Blaine replied, his voice tense once more.

"He already knows," she replied with a shrug, because she knew that on some level Jesse _did _know what he was to her, even if he didn't want to admit it out loud.

"What if I don't break up with Kurt?" She paused, tilting her head as she thought through the options.

"Then I'll just stay with Jesse." He frowned in response, but nodded in resignation, and she decided to leave him to his thoughts. She hopped off the counter, leaning over and kissing his cheek, barely an inch away from his mouth as she whispered "Good night Blaine," before disappearing down the hallway and back to Jesse's room.

They were on a precipice, she knew, and it could go either way. But she was determined to make sure it went _her _way.


	5. Now At Last

"What am I to you?" Jesse asked one day while Rachel poked at her salad she wasn't really interested in.

"I-what?" she asked, trying to ignore Kurt's head glancing up from across the room where he and Blaine were focused on homework, trying to ignore the sudden stop of Blaine's pencil on paper.

"What am I to you?" Jesse repeated, looking her dead in the eye. She opened her mouth, unsure of how to respond.

"You're my boyfriend," she finally settled on, going for the honest-but-not-too-revealing option. Jesse just scoffed, shaking his head and taking away her plate of virtually untouched food as he settled it on the counter behind him.

"But that's not the full story, is it?" he asked, and now Rachel felt like her heart was beating twice as fast. She tried her hardest not to glance in Blaine's direction, but her eyes refused to listen as they sought him out where he was now watching with as much attention as Kurt was, the two of them staring with very different expressions. Kurt was almost entertained, while Blaine looked tense, wary. "I mean, I'm not stupid Rachel."

"I didn't say you were Jesse," she retorted shortly, hoping he would just drop the subject.

"Then explain to me exactly what you feel for me," he replied dryly. She stared at him for a moment, torn between scoffing and crying, finally taking in a deep breath to stay calm.

"Do we have to discuss this here," she said, signaling towards where the other two at least had the decency to pretend to be ignoring them as Jesse whirled around to see them.

"Why not? It's not like they don't know what's going on here any less than I do," Jesse stated, and while she knew that was the case, she didn't particularly want to have this conversation in front of everyone.

"I don't think we should be discussing this right now," Rachel replied instead, but he just crossed his arms over his chest, staring at her for a moment before she cracked. "Fine!" she nearly shouted, and she could see Blaine's head snapping up to watch once more as she took Jesse's hand in her own, aware that this was going to have to be the best bit of acting she'd ever done in her life. "Yes, I was confused for a while, and my relationship with you started off-well, I didn't have the best intentions." She took another deep breath, stepping closer to him and lowering her voice minimally, so that it would seem more intimate to Jesse but Blaine could still hear her, still hear the lies she was spouting out. "You're the one I want to be with. I promise you that. If I've given you any reason to believe otherwise, I'm deeply sorry."

Jesse frowned, looking at her to see if she would break the scene she was creating in her head, but she kept steady, not daring to glance at Blaine, not until Jesse finally broke out with a "Thank god," wrapping his arms tightly around her and kissing the side of her head.

Blaine's frown hurt more than Jesse's accusation.

* * *

><p>"How much of it was a lie?" Blaine asked her a couple days later while they walked down the hallway towards the choir room.<p>

"How much of what was a lie?" she asked, flipping through her sheet music in her folder.

"What you told Jesse in the kitchen the other day?" She pursed her lips, glancing up at him.

"What does it matter?" she asked him, and he let out a low sigh.

"I think we're both past the point of pretending what we feel for each other Rachel," he stated, and she just nodded in agreement.

"But I told you, as long as you're with Kurt, I'll stay with Jesse."

"Even though you lied to him and told him you wanted to be with him," Blaine tried to argue, but she let out a small laugh.

"Who said wanting to be with him was a lie? I may not love him Blaine, but that doesn't mean I don't have any feelings for him." She was startled by how well the lie slipped out, how good she was getting at all this.

Blaine looked at her a moment longer, but then Kurt materialized at his side, a bright and chipper 'Hi!' for his boyfriend and not so much as a glare in Rachel's direction before he whisked them into the choir room, Rachel trudging behind reluctantly.

* * *

><p>She had taken to using the empty auditorium after glee to use as her own personal stage. Sometimes she sang, sometimes she ran lines from various plays she had memorized, sometimes she sat and just stared out at the audience reminiscing on her old life back in New York, or of her future life-also in New York.<p>

She never expected anyone else to interrupt her while she did this, and was too enraptured in the imaginary world she had created for herself where she was accepting a Tony win at the age of 21 for her stunning leading role of Maria in yet another new rendition of West Side Story to even hear anyone enter the auditorium until Blaine nearly fell on top of her.

"Jesus!' she yelled, startled into a sitting position and smoothing out her skirt as she did so, Blaine smirking as he sat next to her.

"I called your name like five times," he replied. "You apparently have some kind of super human ability to ignore me."

"I wasn't ignoring you," she sighed, running a hand through her hair. "I was lost in thought."

"It must have been a pretty intense thought," Blaine chuckled, looking more at ease with her than she was used to. "I was practically screaming your name."

"I was just imagining my Tony award speech," she answered honestly. "A girl can never be too prepared."

"I'm sure she can't," he answered with a wry smile, moving slightly closer to her so their knees were touching now. She didn't comment on it, just raised an eyebrow in response, but he didn't seem to notice.

"Well, now that you have my attention, what is it that you need?" she asked, and he shrugged, though his smile was still in place.

"I kind of had some news," he said, and she just stared in response, trying not to get her hopes up.

"You found a way to get me out of Ohio?" she asked, her tone hopeful as he rolled his eyes at her.

"No, that I can't help you with," he smirked.

"Well then, what use are you to me Blaine Anderson?" she asked jokingly, slightly pushing him in the shoulder. He laughed with her, and she realized he seemed so much _happier _than she had ever really seen him.

"I think I'm of very good use to you," he replied, his voice lower than normal. "I mean, for one, I'm an excellent duet partner."

"I suppose I can agree with that," she sighed dramatically, trying not to tense too much as he leaned even closer to her.

"And for two," he said, now practically whispering. "I happen to know that there's only one thing you want as much as you want New York."

"And that is?" she asked, though her voice was just as low, trying to fight off her nerves.

"Me," he answered before placing a small kiss on her lips, just enough to have her melt into him, her arms instinctively weaving around his neck as she pulled him closer to her. She couldn't even deny the statement, the thought that she had a boyfriend-that she was pretty sure he didn't anymore-long gone from her brain before they pulled away a couple moments later.

"I take it things ended with you and Kurt?" she asked quietly as she rubbed off the hint of lip gloss from his bottom lip.

Blaine nodded, leaning over to kiss her again. "I don't know what took me so long," he answered between soft kisses. "I mean, it's been you for awhile," he mumbled, his lips trailing along her cheek and down to her ear. "I just couldn't bring myself to actually do what I wanted to do I suppose."

"Well, what does this really mean Blaine?" she asked after a moment, pushing him away. "Do you want to be with me?"

"Of course I do," he answered, not even hesitating. "And now I broke up with Kurt, and you can break up with Jesse, and we can be together."

She chewed her lip for a moment, knowing this was what she had wanted all along. "This is going to get really complicated," she told him, and he nodded, cradling her face in his hands.

"It's going to be a shit storm," he answered seriously. "But I'm ready for it if you are."

She smiled, leaning over to place a chaste kiss on his lips. "I was born ready."


	6. Something New

Blaine had given up a lot to finally give in to his feelings for Rachel.

He had given up the first boy he really loved, the first one who had accepted him for who he was. Until Rachel came along, at least, and complicated his life. He had never been attracted to a girl before, and the entire ordeal was confusing to say the least. Between the fact that he was supposed to be happily in a relationship with the boy he had been so sure was the love of his life, and the fact that he was gay, _thank you_, he had never ever expected to fall for someone like Rachel.

He supposed Jesse played a part in it too. He never liked Jesse getting everything, especially not when it was something he wanted. But Jesse was the more talented one, the one with the even brighter future, the one who was going to make it to fame. Blaine was talented, but not nearly enough to go that far. He was smart, he was polite, and he'd be a good businessman. He wasn't going to go into performing.

At first, he thought that was the appeal of Rachel. She was so sure of herself, that she'd make it back to New York, that she'd star on Broadway, that she'd win Tony's and eventually Oscar's. She was confident and talented, and even though he knew it was her sudden appearance in the choir room that first day that drew him to her, in her short skirt with her long dark hair swinging around her face, he was still convinced that it was playing the leads in the school musical together that made him fall for her.

In the end, he didn't care what it was that pulled him towards her, he just knew he couldn't continue with Kurt if his feelings for Rachel were growing stronger by the day. And so he ended it. And while Rachel's name never came up explicitly, he knew Kurt knew the real reason behind it. And when Kurt snapped at him, informing Blaine that one day he'd regret this, Blaine could only hope he was wrong.

* * *

><p>"Don't you think we should take this slower," Blaine asked hesitantly as Rachel pulled him into school the next day, her hand wrapped tightly around his.<p>

"It's not like we're fucking in the hallway Blaine," she replied bluntly, and he sighed deeply while allowing himself be dragged. He had overheard the conversation between Jesse and Rachel the previous night, heard Jesse stomping around from the room next to his after she left, their parents just kind of ignoring the situation.

"Still," he argued quietly, knowing very well that Rachel was going to do exactly what she wanted to do.

"Blaine," she said, her voice quiet as she stopped them, her eyes focused on his. "If you want to do this, we're going to do this. We shouldn't have to hide what we feel just because of one or two people."

"I broke up with him yesterday Rach," Blaine stressed, hoping she'd understand on some level that even if he wasn't dating Kurt anymore, even if he didn't love him like he did, his feelings couldn't 100% dissipate as quickly as hers for his brother could.

"And a half hour later you came after me. Now, do you want to be with me or would you rather run back to him?"

Blaine didn't hesitate before answering "You, of course," knowing even a slight second could cause her to turn against him and ruin what he was risking everything for. And he did want her. He just didn't want to hurt Kurt.

She leaned up, kissing him gently on the cheek before giving him a small smile. "Good. I'll see you later then," she said, squeezing his hand once before disappearing for another section of the school where her first class was.

When he looked over to see Kurt at his locker, glaring at the spot where Blaine was rooted, he could only bring himself to feel a slight twinge of guilt.

* * *

><p>He could hear what they were saying about her. How she was a home-wrecker, a whore, a slut. He wanted to punch every single one of them in the face, because Rachel hadn't done anything, not really. If they wanted to take Kurt's side, fine. Blaine had expected no less. But the group was already against Rachel, had been since she came in and started getting solo's. Few had talked to her, even tried to befriend her.<p>

"If you're going to insist on talking shit," Blaine said loudly as he turned a glare towards the huddle of Cheerio's near him, "why don't you at least get your facts straight?"

"I think the only thing that's straight, Bland, is you now that Berry's here," Santana snapped. Rachel squeezed Blaine's forearm, whispering a quiet 'don't' and pulling his attention towards her instead.

"They're not worth it," she reminded him, and while she looked concerned for him, he could see a hint of happiness he wasn't sure was caused by him layered behind it.

As the days went on, and the comments worsened, he realized that it was the attention Rachel craved. She seemed to step up her game the more the group talked about her, almost as if trying to prove them right. Blaine felt helpless and slightly used, beginning to worry if he was just another trophy to her now. Their kisses in the hallway went from light pecks to full on make out sessions, and Rachel seemed to time it perfectly so that Kurt was always around, as if she was throwing Blaine in his face.

He wanted to ask her about it, but didn't know how. If she admitted that all he was to her was a pawn in her game of boredom while she wasted time in Ohio, he'd be devastated. If she lied, he'd be even more so. And if she hadn't realized she was doing it-well, he wasn't sure how he'd feel about that either.

* * *

><p>He and Jesse had barely spoken since the night Rachel broke up with his brother. The house was tense, divided between the two boys. Their parents tried to stay out of it, and for his part Blaine didn't flaunt Rachel in front of Jesse, despite how often she flaunted Blaine in front of Kurt. But Jesse still tried to pick fights with Blaine, and there was only so much he could take before he snapped.<p>

"What the hell is your problem?" he yelled one night after dinner when Jesse kept commenting on his new sweater Rachel had bought for him.

"What do you mean, what the hell is my problem?" Jesse said calmly, tending to go quieter when Blaine yelled.

"I mean, you've been mocking me and trying to pick fights with me for nearly three weeks now!" Blaine shouted back, getting louder by the second.

"Gee, I wonder why that is?" Jesse hissed. "Not that I wasn't expecting it to come eventually, but the girl I was starting to love left me for my younger brother." Blaine stood there for a second as the realization that Jesse had had read feelings for Rachel swept over him. He had figured they were both just using each other-Jesse using Rachel for something to do, Rachel using Jesse to get to Blaine. He hadn't imagined that Jesse might have developed real feelings in the process, or that he might still have them.

"Wait, you're mad because I got Rachel in the end?" Blaine asked, trying to wrap his mind around it. Jesse just sighed in frustration, and Blaine couldn't help the smile that broke out upon his face. "You're mad because, for once in our stupid lives, I got what you wanted instead of the other way around."

"Yes!" Jesse screamed. "You have what I want Blaine, and god you don't even appreciate her like I do. You go around acting like she's not head over heels for you, like you're leading this hard life of having a fucking talented, attractive girl being in love with you is the biggest problem because she doesn't know how to express herself! Because you think she's just flaunting you around in front of Kurt! You don't deserve her Blaine!"

"I think I know better than you do what I deserve," Blaine shot back. "And maybe if you weren't such a god damn _prick _all the time, she would have liked you better. But you fucked that up on your own, it's not my fault you couldn't win her over. It's not my fault that I finally beat you out of something you want."

"It's not like you've one-upped me Blaine," Jesse argued. "I still had her."

"And now I have her," Blaine smirked. "So I guess I kind of did one-up you. Because I managed to steal her from you without even trying."

"You didn't-god, Blaine, you don't get it. She was always yours. Do you realize how infuriating that is? _She was always yours_. You just didn't want to admit that she was yours because you had your precious little Kurt." Jesse seethed, and Blaine continued to smile. He had to admit, having something Jesse wanted this desperately felt good, felt like he was finally paying back for all the things Blaine wanted over the years that Jesse received.

"That's right, she's _mine_," Blaine grinned cockily. "And you're not getting her back." He could see Jesse about to argue back, ready to snap about something when the doorbell rang, announcing Rachel's arrival.

He was the one to initiate their kiss as soon as he opened the door, to take her hand and lead her up the stairs.

He made sure that she was practically screaming his name by the end of the evening, the feeling of victory sweeping over him as the front door slammed closed and Jesse's car pulled away.


	7. Did You Get My Message

**a/n: **sorry this took so long to complete, my brain just completely shut down against it for awhile apparently. alas, here is the final chapter for you guys. thanks for being patient~!

* * *

><p>Blaine felt a little more comfortable in knowing that if Rachel was using him-for what, he still wasn't sure-he could at least use her a little bit too. Knowing that it was driving his brother insane that Blaine had what he wanted was more than enough to keep their romance alive, even when the comments from their peers threatened to tear them down.<p>

She didn't say anything about his sudden change in attitude towards her, how he became more predatory than boyfriend-ly so quickly, until nearly a week had passed. He wasn't even sure she had noticed the change, which made things worse, made him more annoyed.

"Am I just an experiment to you?" she accused one afternoon after Glee, and his hand tightened around hers reflexively.

"Of course not," he told her honestly, because underneath all the current resentment and competition they seemed to be in, he did have real feelings for her.

"Then how come we don't ever do things like go on real dates? Or am I just something to throw in Jesse's face? _Are _you just using me to torture your brother?" Her voice went quiet at the end, a vulnerability he didn't even know she was capable of causing him to stop in his steps, looking at her-really looking at her for the first time in a long time.

"Of course not," he replied, but his voice wavered a bit, something she picked up on quickly. She withdrew her hands from his, crossing her arms over her chest as she glared at him. She looked pissed but even more than that she looked _hurt_ and it killed a small part of himself to realize he was doing that to her.

"If you just wanted to use me to get under Jesse's skin you could have let me know," she whispered angrily. "You didn't have to let me think that you might have felt the same for me. I could have protected myself against this better." Blaine didn't have a response, never seeing so much expression on Rachel's face before throwing him completely off.

She didn't give him a chance to figure out how to reply anyways, walking away quickly with her head down, and he was sure if he listened hard enough he could hear the sniffles that signaled she was crying, but still he was rooted to the spot, the realization that maybe Jesse was right and Rachel just _didn't _know how to express herself most of the time hitting him hard and low. The realization that he may have just shot the best thing that could have ever happened to him before it had a chance to grow hitting even harder.

He approached Jesse hesitantly that night, unsure of how to go about what he needed to do without causing another fight. Jesse, for his part, was getting very good at ignoring Blaine's existence-not that Blaine wasn't used to that, until he had been a freshman and joined New Directions with Jesse, everyone had believed the older boy was an older child. Still, Blaine knew he had to fix things with Rachel, whatever the cost, and while he didn't particularly want to face a smug Jesse, he had no choice.

"I need to talk to you," Blaine said quietly at Jesse's door that evening. "It's-it's really important, or I swear I wouldn't be bringing this up." Jesse stared at him, his face impassive as he put down his book, the only signal Blaine received to let him know it was okay to continue on. "I think I fucked up."

"Of course you did," Jesse shrugged, and Blaine sighed but didn't argue the statement. "I take it Rachel finally blew up at you then."

"She accused me of only wanting her to fuck you over and-wait, why would you think she would blow up at me?" Blaine asked warily.

"Because I told her you were using her to get under my skin," Jesse responded as if he was telling Blaine the weather, and Blaine had never been one for physical violence but he felt a flash of anger that almost caused him to punch his brother.

"That's not true!" Blaine yelled, all thoughts of a calm conversation flown out the window. "I'm not-"

"Except you have been Blaine," Jesse quipped, not even bothering to sugarcoat this for him. "You've been doing nothing but flaunting her in my face, as much as you tried to avoid doing so at first. And if you felt used when she was just trying to show you affection, regardless of who was around, how do you think she feels?"

"I wasn't trying to use her," he mumbled, rubbing a hand over his face.

"Rachel's a complex girl Blaine. She's an actress and she has depth and emotions beyond even your understanding. If you want to fix it, fucking fix it. It's not hard. Otherwise, don't be surprised when she leaves you for someone superior who can understand her." Blaine didn't bother replying, leaving Jesse's room quickly and heading back to his own, trying to figure out exactly how to make everything up to Rachel.

She ignored him the next day, regardless that he tried apologizing. She didn't even show up for lunch, and when he managed to track her down in the choir room where she was rehearsing she left quickly without a word in his direction.

The next few days were much the same, anytime he tried getting her alone to apologize, to explain his side of things, she'd disappear around a corner, walking out in the middle of glee rehearsal one afternoon when he started trying to apologize in the middle of it.

When Friday rolled around and it had been four days, he decided if she wasn't going to let him apologize to her face, he'd do the cowardly thing and call her and apologize. Not that he expected her to answer the phone, and so he spent nearly two hours trying to figure out the perfect message for her.

He stared down at the words in his notebook, watching as they swirled around and turned into meanings he didn't want her to think, wondering if she'd even really listen at all. Maybe this was the end for them, but he wasn't going to let her go without a fight. He wasn't going to give up on her, and that was the driving force as he picked up his phone, quickly hitting her phone number before he could chicken out.

It rang, and he figured that was a good sign-she didn't pick up and hang up on him, which was a better start than he had hoped for, and eventually her voicemail picked up. _Hello! This is Rachel Berry, and if I'm not answering my phone it's probably because I'm focusing on becoming a big star right now. Leave a message! _

He smiled despite the situation at the sound of her voice, the automatic recording meant for everyone seeming like a savior to him to remind him why he was fighting so hard for her. For her determination and confidence, her talent and perseverance. She was everything he could have ever wanted and more, and if she was going to end things with him, she at least deserved to know where he stood.

"Please record your message at the tone," the voice was saying now, and Blaine cleared his throat, closing his eyes as the tone beeped and he blurted out all he needed to say.

"Rachel, I know you're mad-pissed, really-at me, and I don't blame you. I was a dick, and I can see now why you thought I was using you. But the bottom line is, Jesse or no Jesse-I want you. I would want you. I _did _want you. You're amazing, Rach, and I can't believe I was stupid enough to let my own insecurities manifest and let Jesse pick them apart until I nearly destroyed us. And I hope I didn't do that, destroy us, because I'd like to start over. You and I. No Jesse, no Kurt. Just us. And if you're willing to give me a second chance, shit, Rach, I'll make it up to you. I _will_. You just have to talk to me again, please." He sighed, looking down at his notebook where completely different words were scribbled. "Please just talk to me," he mumbled into his hand, not even bothering to say anything more as he hung up, feeling completely dejected as he decided to climb into his bed, hiding away from the heartache that he felt was now inevitable.

The first thing he noticed when he woke up was that someone's arms were wrapped around him, hands clutching his own and while he looked down at them he knew they were Rachel's, knew she had come back to him. "Rach?" he asked quietly, and she just mumbled incoherently into his back, nuzzling her head into him as she snuggled closer, a blanket thrown over them that he hadn't fallen asleep with.

He unclasped her hands, turning himself around to face her. She was asleep, a peaceful, calm look on her face as she immediately held on to him again, and he couldn't help but place a small kiss on her forehead as he pulled more blankets on top of them, fending against the cold and holding her close, happy for a few moments that she had at least deemed him safe enough to come back to.

He kept his eyes closed when he woke up again, sure that Rachel appearing in his bed last night was a dream, that she was still pissed, that he had fucked things up too far beyond repair. But then he heard a soft sigh, felt her shift in the bed beside him, and a smile grew on his face despite their inevitable conversation.

When she opened her own eyes a few minutes later, he was met with a shy grin, a small 'sorry' falling from her lips before he could shake his head 'no'. "You don't have to be sorry Rachel, I do," he told her, keeping his voice quiet in the early morning. She didn't say anything in return, just placed a small kiss on his shoulder, but nodded. "Are we going to be okay?"

"We're going to start over, yes?" she asked, her eyes wide and hopeful and scared and he knew that he could never say 'no' to her, never turn her away if there was even a chance that she wanted him. "Just you and I? No more drama?"

"Just you and I," he promised, keeping his eyes focused on her own. "No more drama."

"I'd like that, " she yawned, exhaustion creeping over her expression again. "I'd like that a lot."

"Me too," he promised, his grip around her tightening as they let themselves fall back to sleep, Blaine never remembering a time he was happier than he was in that moment, the sound of her steady breathing lulling him to sleep once more.


End file.
